Divorcing a Cluster B – Trust your instincts

If there is one thing I want to instil in my children , it is to trust your instincts — your inner voice, your gut feelings, your intuition. In the family court system, the judge requires black and white evidence — regardless of how strong our instincts are. We teach our children to keep speaking up when it comes to things that are important — keep talking until someone listens. My story is proof of how important that really is.

One thing that I have learned from divorcing a narcissist (Cluster B disordered individual) is that the battle has nothing to do with what is best for the children. A custody battle with a narcissist is fueled by a desire to win at all costs. The loss of control when the marriage ends causes the narcissist to grab the nearest weapon (the children) in an effort to maintain or regain control. In my case, my ex knew that the way to really hurt me was to take away our children from me. He went so far as to blindly put a custody evaluation in my lap for no reason. He joined forces with his customers to solicit letters about me that were false, along with his family. Why was he doing this you ask? Because to him it was a sick game of winning and not about right or wrong for our children. He went on dating sites later to be known as “tinder” and targeted females who were either an attorney, counselor, teacher or had connections to the legal field. He was on a mission and stopped at nothing to win.

 

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